There Must Be Lots Of Unemployed Party Clowns

30 Sep

I’m not sure why I am still shocked when I show up to a 3 year old’s birthday party and see an open bar and a DJ at 3pm. I’ve been to enough of these events to know that when you can see the satellite sized party balloons from Sunset Blvd., there is not going to be any pin the tail on the donkey going on.
I’m not going to lie, I appreciate the valet parking. Schlepping a gift and kids while trying to look semi pulled together is a lot easier when you don’t have to hike in heels and a sundress.
I should be used to the cotton candy machines, green screens, and professional photographers by now. I mean your kid only turns 1, 2, or especially 3 once!
Yet every time I find myself thinking, “Holy shit, is that a photo booth over there?” while I shove all my kids in for our awesome photo op. This weekend I found myself in a scuffle with an 8 year old for my spot in line to get my palm read.
What does she need her palm read for anyways? I can tell her her future, she lives in Beverly Hills, her Dad is a Plastic Surgeon and her Mom is a former Super Model, she’s going to be just fine.
At the last party I went to, instead of a sweet CD with all the kid’s favorite songs on it, we were given personalized T-shirts and matching hats. The question is, what is this kid going to expect at his Bar Mitzvah or Sweet Sixteen? The even better question is what are my kids going to say when they are old enough to realize that putting the bounce house up in our backyard and having pizza and cake is not the coolest thing in town?

A friend of mine told me once, don’t give your kid too much money from the “tooth fairy” when she loses her first tooth. You just fuck it up for the rest of us. Maybe the same theory applies for birthday parties.



Comments, questions, I love them both!

3 Responses to “There Must Be Lots Of Unemployed Party Clowns”

  1. jp October 1, 2012 at 10:04 am #

    I remember being told that you should only invite as many guests as the age of the birthday child. That is not realistic but neither is the extravaganza party. It is overwhelming for the child. 99% of the American public find these extravagant displays repulsive, no matter how wealthy the family is. The teaching of values is questioned. I am impressed when I see children give some of their new gifts to children who are needy. How about the parents eliminating some of the over the top elements of the party and giving the cost to a food bank or some similar charity. The best parties are those where you can see the love and participation that the family shows … not how much they spent.

  2. jp October 1, 2012 at 10:59 pm #

    I wrote the previous reply after watching a news show about people who are suffering in the economy. I think the party givers have no idea that being overly extravagant could negatively affect people who are struggling just to provide necessities. If someone sends me how, I will edit my previous comment. I was too critical.

  3. hc October 2, 2012 at 1:25 pm #

    Les- Once again… I’m dying! I can’t wait to show this to my husband. We just celebrated our sons first birthday and he thought I was crazy for wanting to make cupcakes and chocolate covered Oreos (thanks pintrest). Thanks for this!

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