The Things I Am Not Thankful For – Part 1

21 Nov

I promise that tomorrow I will write a heartfelt post about all the things and people that I am thankful for. I am lucky and blessed beyond belief, but I will save that for the other post. This is not that kind of day, so this is just not that kind of post.

Here are all the things I am not thankful for:

1. Mean Mommies – There is not one reason that I can think of to be mean to another Mother unless she did something to really piss you off. I don’t care what you look like or what kind of day you are having. If you are walking into the school or down the street schlepping your kids and I’m schlepping mine, just smile. You don’t have to strike up a conversation with me, because lord knows I have days when I do not want to discuss anything child related with a stranger. But to mad dog another Mom for no reason should be a punishable offense.

2. The Checkout People at Trader Joe’s – It usually goes a little something like this, “Yes, all these groceries are for my family. No, I am not having a party. Yes, I realize this is the fullest cart you’ve seen all day. No, I don’t need help out with my gigantic heaping filled to the brim cart.” I have a husband, three kids, many siblings and friends that all like to be fed when they are at my house, which is quite often. Just because someone buys three bags of veggie sticks it does not mean they are hosting a Super Bowl/Oscar/Birthday party. Stop asking questions and just scan my stuff, in fact feel free to throw in some chocolate covered edamame for putting up with all the people behind me rolling their eyes.

3. Sephora – That place is just not right. It’s like putting a person a strict diet in the middle of a candy factory before they’ve had their Slim Fast shake. It’s just too much fun in there. All the pretty packages, colors and the beautiful makeup. I don’t even usually wear that much makeup but that store makes me want to. When I walk in I want to put it all on, the creams, the primers, foundations, powders, glosses, potions, perfumes and put a shiny bow on top of my head. I actually avoid going in there because I start to feel panicked at the fact that there is a whole world of beauty that I barely own any stock in. Not to mention the cost. I have never walked out without spending at least 100 bucks on things I definitely can live without.

4. Tarantulas – I just can’t seem to get past my sheer terror at the thought of them. I know God must have had a reason for them, but what could it have been? Besides scaring the crap out of me…

5. My next door neighbor – She hates me. She hates my kids. She wouldn’t say hello to me even if I hand washed her ugly car for her. She asked our nanny why my kids cry and yell so much, and if their was something wrong with them. I said Shabbat Shalom once and I’m pretty sure she growled at me, like literally a dog growl. I realize that it can’t be easy living next to a house full of screaming kids, but we do our best to keep it contained. I don’t open the windows and hang the kids out of them and tell them to scream bloody murder. She’s a Mother and a Grandmother, give a frickin’ break, throw me a bone. How about a wink, maybe she could just wink at me, not even a hello, or a wave would work. Definitely not thankful for my next door neighbor.

Happy Thanksgiving! Be back tomorrow with all the things I AM thankful for!


3 Responses to “The Things I Am Not Thankful For – Part 1”

  1. dirtyrottenparenting November 21, 2012 at 1:39 pm #

    I am not thankful for the teeny tiny parking lot at our daycare. It’s a nightmare to get in and out of with a mini-van while trying to avoid hitting small dashing children and humongus full sized pick-up trucks.

  2. dd December 2, 2012 at 5:32 am #

    Why be upset at the trader joes person who is just trying to reach out and be nice to you? Sounds a little 90210 arrogant to me.

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