Oral Fixation – Them, Not Me!

11 Jun

Just when I thought I was out of the “they put everything in their mouth” danger zone, I am jolted back to reality.

The twins turned 3 in April and usually by this age the intense oral fixation has worn off. They slowly stop licking, biting, and chewing on everything that comes near them. Now, of course the oral fixation doesn’t disappear in all people and that’s a whole different topic and this isn’t that kind of blog.
Back to my story – I’ve started allowing smaller toys and objects in to my house which were previously banned. Growing up, my Mom instilled an intense fear of choking in all five of us children.
I knew better than to allow the deadly quarter sized bouncy ball and marker caps anywhere near my children. TR and HB are now old enough to play with Barbies together and who am I to deprive them of a tiny Barbie heel or a minuscule Barbie lipstick?

Well guess what?
I left the twins alone for two minutes today while I went to the bathroom (pee pee). Upon my return to the play room I found one of my worst case scenarios playing out right before my eyes.
TR (3) was standing on the couch with her mouth wide open, JH (3) was standing about two feet in front of her with a teeny tiny bouncy ball.
I hear JH say,

“That’s good, keep your mouth big open and I gonna throw the little ball in.”

It was a scene from a movie, a horror film. Everything was blurry from there….

I know I screamed, “Noooooooooo!!!!!!!” and I’m pretty sure I leapt through the air towards them. I intercepted the tiny choke ball and tried to calmly explain to the twins that we never NEVER never try to throw a small object into someone else’s mouth.
I have no idea how many attempts JH had made before I caught them.


Was this my fault? I mean, I had to pee…

I had never told them specifically not to do that. I have also never told them not to shove each other in the dryer. I have never told them not to hit the TV with a baseball bat. I have never told them not to climb out a window. I have never told them not to eat paper clips, staples or batteries.

That after almost seven years of being a Mother, I still can’t go to the bathroom in peace.
That 3 year old twins should never ever be left alone, even for a minute.
That I f**king hate those little plastic bouncy balls.



2 Responses to “Oral Fixation – Them, Not Me!”

  1. jp June 11, 2013 at 9:54 am #

    When their father was about that age he popped a grape into his mouth and proceeded to choke. His older brother ( 10 ) did the hiemlick ? maunuever and popped it out. Needless to say I was hysterical. I think it would be good to warn them about grapes.

  2. Sahar June 11, 2013 at 11:55 am #

    I can’t tell you how much I just laughed … but just know that I HAVE actually had to tell mine not to hit the TV with a baseball bat, climb out of a window and not eat staples and batteries. So you can feel good about that :)

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