Tag Archives: school

The Sick Joke – Visiting Week

26 Aug

I have been looking forward to today for 4 weeks. First day of Preschool!!

Summer camp ended a month ago for my 3 year old twins and I have been counting down ever since then. But, of course, I found out yesterday, it was too good to be true. As it turns out, this week is in fact not the first week back to school for the kids. For their age group it is “visiting week” at their Preschool. Which means that I go with them for an hour everyday all week. That’s it, one hour, and done.

I cried when I heard, literally cried.

Visiting Week. Awesome concept. Get the kids acclimatized, let them meet their new teachers, get used to the routine, ease into the transition.
For this mother of three, who has been to the Zoo, The Aquarium, The Beach and every Park within a 5 mile radius – not so awesome.

I totally grasp the concept and psychology behind it. I’m sure some of this, one hour a day visiting is done so the parents can adjust to leaving their children at school. I was once a first time parent with an only child, I get it. But those days are three screaming kids and 5 thousand sleepless nights behind me.
I have no qualms about teachers peeling a hysterical child off my leg as I walk out of the classroom door and wave bye-bye. I’ve been through this before. They cry for five minutes, demand Mommy comes back. Then, they discover a puzzle or a toy that they like and they might as well be orphans.

As “visiting time” wrapped up today, I seriously considered slipping the teachers some money to keep the kids there for a couple extra hours. It’s cruel to make a mother, feed and dress two 3 year olds, get them into car seats, into school and then send them right back home again after an hour, cruel.

It has been the longest Summer of my entire life. I have learned a lot about myself. I have learned that I am totally capable of taking care of three young children all by myself. I learned that I am much more resourceful than I look. I learned that going to bed exhausted after a long day of hard work feels fulfilling. I learned that no matter how hard I try, I will always hate the feeling of sand on dry feet. I learned that I have to eat every few hours or I develop an intense uncontrollable rage.

The biggest thing that I learned, is that despite all my complaining, fear and sarcasm, I actually enjoy my children. I love being their Mommy. I do prefer them in smaller less intense doses, but overall, I am enjoying this gig.

I am easing into the Mommy thing. All I need is these kids back in school so I can have some refueling time and all will be well again in the Mommyhood.

Visiting week. Really?



Sarcasm is Motherhood Set On Fire

6 Aug

My sarcasm level has reached an all time high.

I am still looking at 3 weeks until all the kids are back in school.

I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around how I’ve even made it this far. I am already 10 days deep into Mommy Camp and I am fried. Deep Fried.

6am-8pm, entertaining three children under the age of 7. I swear, just the thought of it gives me hives, literally. As I write this, I have hives on my chest. If there was such a thing as Summer Time Fear Hives, these would be them.

I can handle a week with all of them, no problem. Do a Griffith Park horsey/train day. Do a Long Beach Aquarium adventure. Do a Zimmer Museum outing. Chill at the park one day. But this? Over one month with no camp or school?

I am aware that there are wonderful Pinterest boards full of crafts and cooking projects that I could set up for the kids. Every time I check them out, I think to myself, if I was into this stuff I would have become a school teacher. As for backyard relays and scavenger hunts, again, if I was that energetic and fun, I probably wouldn’t be sitting here writing about my hate for Summer break.

At this point you might be wondering why I had kids at all… Trust me, I have thought the same thing over the past ten days more than once.

I love being a Mom. I love having three kids. I love spending time with them. I also know that I am a better Mom when exposed to my kids in moderation. In other words, I need my breaks! I crave my alone time. I have to have those few hours while they nap or go to school to recharge and regroup.

A family member once told me that I am not a “natural mother.” I guess that could be interpreted in many different and mostly offensive ways. If needing breaks and adult socialization while being a stay at home Mom makes me “unnatural” then so be it.

For now, I am relying heavily on M&M’s for bribery, the TV for distraction, and the calendar, to mark each day that we get closer to school starting.

Sarcasm and humor are guiding my way as it usually does.

I read an article yesterday that said, children don’t comprehend sarcasm. If that’s the case then I wonder if my kids have understood anything I’ve been saying to them all these years?



Mommy Lies To You

4 Mar

HB asked me this morning if our house was going to get robbed. She said that her friend’s neighbors house was robbed and she would like to know if they were going to come to our house.

It’s questions like these that either shock me silent or send me into mumbling explanations of nothingness. What do I tell her? I want my 6 year old to feel safe in her neighborhood, in her home, in her bed. But, I don’t want to lie to her and give her a false sense of safety and set her up for disappointment in the world.

My genius Mother of the Year response: We are not going to get robbed. These bad things happen very rarely. We don’t have anything the robbers want and they don’t want children, so you are safe.

It was a mix of lies and truths. In our neighborhood these things don’t happen too often and for the most part she is safe. We could one day get robbed and in the most horrific situations children do get taken. I tell my kids little lies like this all the time. I don’t condone holding the truth from them when it will harm them, but as the Mom I use my own discretion to decide when a little fib is appropriate.
The time we were in Froyolife and the news came on, the headline flashed about 18 six year olds being murdered in their school in Connecticut. HB read it and looked at me wild eyed and said, “Is that true?!” I didn’t even think twice, “Of course not, it is a pretend movie, let’s finish our yogurt outside.”
If she had been 10 or 12 or 16 a totally different conversation would have taken place. There was no need for my 6 year old to know that in fact people walk into schools and kill kids her age in her grade for no reason and without warning. She thinks the lockdown drills at her school where they hide in the classroom in the dark are to keep them safe from swarms of bees. I intend to keep it that way, at least for a little while.

The world will come sweeping away her innocence soon enough, I’m in no hurry to speed up the process. She knows not to talk to strangers, she knows that her body is her private property. She also believes in the tooth fairy and asks if I can see her muscles growing as she eats her veggies.

Part of my job as Mother of three is to not only keep them safe from harm, but to make them FEEL safe from harm. I strap them into carseats, I put helmets on them, and get them immunized. Just as importantly, I check closets for monsters, kiss ouchies, and lie about the darkest truths of our world.


Do you agree with me? Comments and questions always welcome.


What’s For Din-Din?

14 Jan

The question of the day seems to be, what are you cooking tonight?

I do not have an answer for you.

This morning HB said she was sick only to have a revelation at 11:30am that she was perfectly healthy and wanted to go to school. What prompted this miraculous recovery? She remembered that today was her first day of after school art class. Art Class = Full Instant Recovery.
Between getting everyone dressed, fed and to their schools, I barely had time to sneeze before it was time to pick-up the twins at 11:45am.
So….. What is for dinner? I’m sure there a million Moms trying to figure out the exact same thing right now. The real issue is, I can’t quit now! It’s only week 2 of my healthy home cooked kid friendly meals project.
When back-up arrives in half hour I will have a plan. I am not scared of cooking. Poultry is not the enemy. I can do this. The oven is my friend. Yes, that’s right.



Celebrity Shelebrity

25 Oct

When you live around here it’s considered a major no-no to make a big deal about a celebrity sighting. There are major celebrities in my kid’s schools, on my kid’s soccer teams, and in their ballet/art/ karate classes.

If I ran over every time I spotted a star I would be an embarrassment to my kids and to myself. I will admit that there have been a few times where I thought I knew a Mom from baby class and I said Hi and then later realized she’s a regular on CSI or Law and Order, and I didn’t actually know her at all.
There are some people that I reserve the right to completely humiliate myself
and approach if I see them.

1. Madonna – Hello?! It’s Madonna! Gaga can wear meat dresses and Britney can dance with snakes. But there is only one Queen.
2. Mark Ruffalo – because we have a special connection. He doesn’t know it, but we do.
3. Catherine Zeta Jones – I don’t really need to talk to her. I just want to see her up close, I think she is stunning.
4. Zooey Deschanel – She has similar hair texture and style to mine. I want to know how she keeps her bangs from frizzing up or getting oily.
5. The Super Nanny (Jo) – because I need her to be a part of my life. She knows things I will never know. She is a child whisperer and as far as I’m concerned a legend in her own time.
6. Did I mention Mark Ruffalo?


Who do you go gaga for? Comments and questions always welcome :)

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